March 30, 2012

Differences

While I spent the night in the hospital recently, hubby got to have an interesting conversation with SB. I had my moment some time ago. Now, it was his turn.

SB was very worried about my being in the hospital. She was clingy and needy, and asked hubby to get in the bath with her. He knew she needed lots of extra comforting, so he agreed. He did so anticipating what would likely come next.

Up to this point, SB has been fond of telling me, "Girls have a bagina, boys have a butt." After turning my face away to smirk, I would explain that everybody has a butt, and what boys have that makes them different from girls is a penis.

But that was all conceptual. Now she had the, um, evidence, right in front of her.

She looked right at his privates and pointed, saying, "What dat?"

Because we believe in being open and honest, hubby explained that he is a boy so he has a penis. She asked a few questions, which he answered simply. She checked herself out and looked at him again. And that was pretty much that.

Hubby sharing the exchange with me late that night in the ER gave me a much needed laugh during a tense situation. I wondered if SB might tell me about it herself, but she never did.

She has become much more curious about her male friends however. She recently had a little boy her age over. The plan was for them to play with water out on our deck, so his mom and I changed the kids into their bathing suits.

SB kept sneaking glances at him while he was naked, and I was just waiting for her to point and say, "Look, Jacob has a penis!" Fortunately, she did not.

A few days later we were at a different friend's house for a play date. The one year-old boy needed a diaper change, and SB could not stop staring. I explained to her that it is not polite to stare, that he needed privacy.

So I guess we are at the point where I need to explain modesty and privacy with SB, without instilling in her any shame about her body. How does one do this? It seems a delicate balance. Have you been though this stage? How did you handle it?
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