I'm starting to dread checking my email. It used to be a pleasurable experience. One I looked forward to. Now as I watch my inbox open up on the screen I wonder, "Is there more bad news?"
The subject line doesn't give it away. So I have that moment where I see the email is from a literary agent I have queried and think, "Maybe this is it!" And there are those agonizing few seconds while I wait for it to open. Then I start to read and... Well for me, so far, there's only been one outcome. Rejection.
You see, I'm a writer trying to get published. Which means every day brings a chance for a new rejection. I've only received six so far. That is nothing in the publishing world. It doesn't even place me in the category of a "real" writer. But I'm definitely on my way.
I have developed a healthy respect for literary agents. They work incredibly hard. I don't even know how they manage to have actual lives with everything they have going on. And I have received some of the nicest rejections. The majority of my rejections have been personal; they complimented my work and told me not to give up. The end is always the same - it just isn't "the right fit." Publishing, I've been told over and over, is a very subjective business.
I am receiving lots of encouragement. From other writers and from members of my target audience who have read excerpts from my book. They love it. They can't wait for it to be published. I'm developing quite a cheering section. And I'm not talking about friends and family. These are people I have never met. They have no reason to be nice. They could easily bash my work if they wanted to.
Their positive feedback has been wonderful. Now, if an agent could just show interest and request a copy of my proposal...
But actually, I think my membership into the writers' club requires me to suffer a little bit longer.